June 2009
84,22,69 or 78 GET
“Today, I realized that the closest thing I have to a savings account is the cup...”
– Like a portal into my future…
As frustratingly shitty Vimeo is sometimes...
At least the comments aren’t flat-out insulting. I’ve never seen something like:
How rude!!!…im sure you have great legs… its your face thats the problem…
on Vimeo. Reading YouTube comments in general is just a shockingly bad idea.
Television, television
Washingtonienne
Party Down
Greek
Moonlight
Entourage
May 2009
“Many gingers, Hattenstone notes, “say they’ve been bullied or harassed because...”
– To all of my friends. Especially those who I spend the week in Melbourne with. Calling me names such as ‘Ginger Tree’ and ‘Jet Star’ and ‘Ginger Jets’ is pretty much committing a hate crime against Gingers. (via mashburger)
So is calling you Nigger Jets okay or…?
The American language
Why do they pronounce Israel “Is Real”?
“Fuck a bean cheese burrito. fuck a bowl of cookie dough.”
– Taking advice from NOFX songs. In this case “Fun Things To Fuck”
Some are calling for tighter regulation on... →
Note to self: Go to a burlesque show.
“Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I...”
– Natural selection [via fml]
“Taxi drivers say they use conference calls to discuss directions and find out...”
– Ever wonder what taxi drivers are always yammering about?
Imagine being paid to play computer games after...
aidenpyne:
iwontallowit:
That’s exactly what happens to five high-tech whiz kids in this exciting new action-adventure series, after the president of a software company hires them to breathe new life into her struggling game business. Based in offices they call “The Crash Zone,” Mike, Pi, Bec, Marcello and Ram test computer games while they build friendships with each other.
I fucking loved...
picture of zooey.
nedhepburn:
caption.
Ned’s being all meta today. Not sure if I like it as much as an actual picture of Zooey.
“I can’t stop seeing the choreography when I hear it. My foot just starts...”
– Beyonce.
“But srsly yall… nip slips might still be better than ’seeing a whole tit’...”
– This is more or less how I feel, once again worded much more elegantly than I ever could by Carles.
Excerpts from the diary of an App Store reviewer -... →
“I brought down the sky for you, but all you did was shrug.”
– Audience of One by Rise Against. This is kinda where my head’s at right now. It’s been two months and sometimes I still miss you. Lols.
Vindication!
When I saw that 30 Rock episode with Becca (the pregnant girl from Dunkin’ Donuts or whatevs), I was sure that, for a show so culturally aware, they’d made a mistake when Liz sings “With You” by Chris Brown after Becca says “Some of them don’t even know who Ne-Yo is”. But then I saw the episode on Australian television and the line was changed to...
DEALBREAKER
You don’t like oatmeal raisin cookies. What’s wrong with you?
Rolling Stone reveals some of the bands featured... →
Yay for more Weezer and Billy Idol.
Here is something cool for you to write in your...
Internet superstar Molly McAleer’s youtube handle/alias/nom de guerre is VloggingMolly84. If you haven’t figured this out yet (because your taste in music is bad), it’s obvs a reference to Irish-American Punk band Flogging Molly whose best single is “Drunken Lullabies” (prove me wrong).
I’ve restarted this post like a bunch of times trying to make it less...
“I’m right into the Blur reunion, ‘cos it’ll finish off the...”
– Oh Liam Gallagher, you beautiful man. You’re just so unaware of what you’re saying.
Roy, I know you're reading this. Were you high...
Roy: Tetris is such a deep game, man.
Jake: No it isn't. Not at all.
Roy: you can view it on so many levels!
Roy: it's about moving blocks around
Roy: but you can see that as a metaphor for packing groceries!
Roy: but you can also see the game on a greater scale
Roy: as a metaphor for closet homosexuals
Roy: because you spend so much time fucking everything up
Roy: when you really just wish for one of those red long shafts to come along and fulfill your desires
Roy: but they never do, and you just end up stacking lots of inferior shapes
Roy: and it can work, and you can get some points
Roy: but you can never pull off the uber master combo without one of those hard red long slender shafts
Roy: oh and the aforementioned homosexuals are pretty promiscuous, too
Roy: because once one of the shafts comes along
Roy: you just obliterate a few rows
Roy: and it feels great
Roy: but then it's gone, and you feel empty again
Roy: and long for another shaft
Roy: that is all
Roy: all of this came to me in a vision while procrastinating on cleaning my room and playing tetris
What's in a joke? →
An essay on humor that deconstructs an example joke (in this case a Russian one) in order to display the mechanics of it. If you’re into that sort of thing.
“Today, I was visiting Munich when a drunk man and his friend started to pick a...”
– So this is probably the best thing I’ve ever read. 